winds_voice | 7

[Wherever Eley happens to be right now, it seems pretty windy. Whether it's because of his influence or just the natural way of the weather, you can't really be sure, but thankfully his voice carries loud enough not to be hindered by the wind.

Only... his tone might sound a little less curious than you're used to. Somewhat distant. Perhaps even a tiny bit sad?]

As I have recovered enough from my illness to venture out with no ill effects, and since the weather has improved, I have decided to take the opportunity to seek shelter in the mountains. While I would still prefer to refrain from keeping myself in confined spaces for too long, I am hoping I will be able to make use of any shelter I find in future to prevent myself from falling sick again.

I would like to take a moment to thank the people here for teaching me your ways and helping me to take better care of myself. It has been an... interesting experience.

However, I also must announce that I will be staying in these mountains for quite some time. I would... like to ask you not to seek me out.

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You must have memories that you do not wish to recall. They hurt, do they not? I suppose I am... hurting from memories then. Yet I am unclear as to what course of action to take. If I stay close to humans then I risk betrayal. If I keep my distance... perhaps I can protect myself.

However, staying away was easier when I did not develop trust in the first place. So here I will stay, until I decide what to do.

Of course I have memories like that. ...But I can't run away from them, because that means turning my back on the good things, too.

[Forgetting is tempting, of course. His heart hurts just thinking about it.]

The thing is, you're not protecting yourself.

[Eley's sensing that Tsuzuki's been through something like this before, at least regarding bitter memories.]

I admit that I would miss the... good encounters I have had thus far. But tell me, how am I not protecting myself this way?

Look, I know it must feel like a good idea right now.

[Tsuzuki has his share of bad memories, sure, but that only makes him more invested in trying to help Eleytheria. He knows what happens once a person a person withdraws from their lives.]

But you'll still feel hurt by the old encounters, even though you're alone. All you're doing is running away from the people that care about you.

Hmm... memories never disappear, you are right. Still, I can prevent more from haunting me in future this way. Is that not true?

[He pauses, hesitating a little.]

I do not intend to forget the people who have helped me. I am still grateful to them, even now.

[He shakes his head, although Eley can't see it.]

Don't you think your friends will worry if you abandon them?

[Of course he does... he knows they care. He can't pretend he doesn't by now. But at the same time he knows that he risks hurting them as much as humanity could potentially hurt him.]

Humans have a way of moving on despite their sadness...

That's a harsh thing to say. Moving on from sadness isn't easy. It can swallow you whole.

...Did someone hurt you in Luceti? Is that why you're leaving?

[There's a long pause as he lets those words sink in.]

Nobody hurt me directly. However, I did converse with someone and that may have... influenced my decision somewhat. He appeared to be suffering terribly... at the hands of humans. He claims to have tried many things but has always found nothing but pain in the end.

.... [Sorry Eley, but that will simply not fly. Tsuzuki's voice is still very soft, almost sad.]

Eley, do you remember how hurt you were when your believers stopped relying on you?

[Oh... well that obviously struck a chord with him. He speaks softly himself now, though he's listening intently.]

Yes... I remember.

This I don't understand. You know how bad it feels, but yet you still let your friends go through the same emotion because of something a stranger said?

[Well... that does get him thinking...]

I did not think about the possibility that my friends would feel this way. That they thought so highly of me.

Why shouldn't they think highly of you?

I do not... really have an answer for that. I have just resolved myself to believing that I am not important to humans anymore. Or... anyone else I should meet.

But if you think like that you will be so unhappy. You can't spend an eternity like that.

[Hypocrisy, what is that?]

What do you hope will happen to you in the future, Eley?

[The future? It's then Eley realises that he's never really thought much about the future for himself.]

The only future I have ever known is one following the purpose given to me in Aether. I would continue the same path until the planet, and ultimately myself, died.

Now things have changed... I am not sure what I hope for.

You're living like a mortal right now, don't you? What about hoping for some of the things mortals want out of their lives?

What mortals want...?

[He thinks about that for a moment, trying to pinpoint what those things might be.]

I am not sure if I understand them enough to pursue the same things... At least not yet. What do mortals want from this world? Wealth? Family?

Hope. Love.

I think everyone wants to feel that special connection you get with others, once you get to truly know them. Don't you think so?

Edited 2013-01-10 17:30 (UTC)

Love...

[That was still something Eley wondered about. And honestly, the more they talk about this, the more Eley starts to realise that perhaps he doesn't really want to isolate himself like this...]

I believe I could say that I want that. For as long as it lasts.

[That's just the point. Isolation has a heavy price.]

It's a wonderful feeling. Better than anything else I've felt. ---I hope it finds you.

...in these circumstances I doubt that it will. Then again I would not be aware of what I was looking for even if I stayed closer to people. Maybe it is not something I am supposed to experience.

Don't say that. Love can strike anybody, no matter who they are.

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